The Charm Bracelet
Blog -> Family
Over the last few weeks I read a great book: Bringing up Girls by James Dobson. Having two daughters now, I really want to understand girls more. I understand our son relatively well (he shows many of the character traits that I have as well, so I can relate to him very well and understand him relatively well). But our girls are a bit more of a mystery to me. (Not to my wife however. I guess it's natural that most parents understand children of their own gender a bit better.)
I want to encourage every parent of a daughter to read this book. It's just a great read, full of scientific, biblical and experiential truths. Absolutely worth reading.
However, the story that gripped me the most was one about a Charm Bracelet. I'm not sure if it's a real story or ficticious. But either way, it really spoke so strongly to me. The short story is available online, for example here:
What it communicates is exactly what our conviction is as well (as described in our book). There's really no reason to be romantically involved with another person unless you know it's going to last. If we start sharing things exclusively with one another (holding hands, saying "I love you", sleeping together, etc) and then the relationship ends, then we get heartbroken. Heartbreak happens every time we share something with another person and then have to take it back again. People do crazy things when they experience this kind of pain, including suicide or murder (or even both).
It's absolutely against today's culture. It requires a lot of self-discipline. It hurts. But it's so rewarding in the end. Once you land in the heaven of marriage, you realize that it's worth the wait.
I'm thinking about our own version of the Charm Bracelet. We won't do exactly what these parents did. But it gave us great inspiration. As our girls grow, we will give them something like a Charm Bracelet as well. And we will pray and do our best to teach them this simple truth: There's no need to be romantically involved with a guy, unless you know it's going to last for life. Save it all for the right time. Don't give parts of yourself away, just to get hurt by a breakup. And reap the rewards on the day you say "I do".
God's way is still the best. No matter what culture says!
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